“Daniel?” asked the voice on the phone.
“Yes, who is this?”
“This is your grandmother.”
Daniel was now upset.
“How'd you get my number?” Daniel asked.
“Daniel, who is it?” Lindsay wondered.
“I got it from your sister,” Daniel's grandmother, Marlene, answered. By this time, Randy, Rod and Ann returned from the restroom.
“I knew it was a mistake to give her my cell number,” Daniel muttered. “What do you want Grandma?”
“I thought his grandma was dead,” Lindsay pointed out to Randy.
“I want you to bring the family together before I die,” Marlene said.
“I would like to Grandma but I'm awfully busy and besides, don't you remember what happened the last time the family was together? At Grandpa's funeral?”
…The house was ablaze and fire trucks surrounded the funeral home as the Judge family looked on.
Daniel sighed. “I don't think this is covered by Grandpa's life insurance.”
“At least I got the watch,” Stephen said as he held the watch out in front of his son's face.
“That's it. I'm out of this family,” Daniel turned around and left.
“Oh you said that every time the family got together,” Marlene said over the phone. “Besides, I have a good reason for wanting to get the family together.”
“Oh, really,” Daniel smiled. “What?”
“I'm going to kill myself on my next birthday.”
Daniel slowly shut his cell phone and drank the rest of his coffee, which was cold. Trance-like, Daniel stood up and dropped an uncounted amount of money on the table. Everyone looked at one another as Daniel headed for the exit. His friends followed shortly after and caught up with him outside.
“Daniel, what's wrong?” Lindsay asked.
“That was my Grandma. She's threatening to kill herself.”
“Oh my God that's horrible!” Lindsay paused for a couple of seconds before grabbing Daniel's shoulder and stopping him. “I thought you told me she was dead.”
“I did. And she's not.”
“Why would you lie to me about something like that?”
“Hmm, well, if you're gonna get upset about me killing off my Grandma then I guess I should tell you that my Mom, Dad, sister, aunts, uncle and cousins are still alive also.”
“You lied to me about your whole family?” Lindsay shrieked.
“Well you'll be happy to know that my grandfather is still dead,” Daniel smiled. Lindsay just scowled at him and stormed off to her car. “Are we still on for to-Ah, forget it.” Daniel looked at his watch then at his remaining friends. “Do you guys want to go to a bar or something?”
“Your grandma is threatening to kill herself,” Ann said. “You should probably go see her.”
“I haven't seen her for five years,” Daniel acknowledged, “why break the streak now?”
“Look, Danny, I was never a huge fan of you completely pushing away your family but this is a chance to start anew and bring your family together again,” Randy said.
“This isn't a Christmas special, Randy. You've met my family and they scared you!”
“Only a couple of them. Just your uncle and Benjamin and your aunt and your father and…okay, your whole family scares the bejeezus out of me. I hate them,” Randy started to cry.
Randy had met Daniel's family about a year before Grandpa Sam died. It was a Fourth of July cookout and Daniel didn't want to be alone with his family. Daniel pulled into the driveway. Grandpa Sam was at the grill barbecuing the burgers while Grandma Marlene sat on the concrete steps. Stephen was probably in the house watching sports on TV while Uncle Linus was trying once again to fix the riding lawn mower. Emily was standing behind Grandma, leaning on the railing and drinking from a Coke can. Daniel could hear Chris, Arnold, Ben and Nathan behind the house playing.
Daniel and Randy got out of the car and began walking up to the house. “Five bucks says there's beer in that Coke can,” Daniel gambled.
“You're on,” said Randy.
“Also my Grandpa is very deaf so talk loudly,” Daniel informed. “Grandma! How have you been doing?” Daniel said as he hugged Marlene.
