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Internet for Housewives

A spoof of computer manuals.

Unless you want another doorstop, avoid buying one of those computer manuals that are two or three inches thick and that cost forty, fifty or even more dollars. I am one person who finds these books impossible to understand and I used to get As in English.

The computer is the sort of machine that once you know how to do something, it seems so easy you don't know how you couldn't have known it. Before that you will stare at the screen not knowing what the heck you are doing.

I read somewhere that the actor who played the Canadian Tire man on TV quit. He was embarrassed and felt he was the laughing stock of the country. I think that is a shame. Now they have a dog.

I miss the Canadian Tire Man. I often wonder what neighborhood he lived in and whether I could move in. No matter what was the neighbor's problem, the Canadian Tire Man had just the tool to fix it.

I used to fantasize that I could go to the store and buy a Canadian Tire Man. Not to have sex; I'm already married. No I needed a Canadian Tire Man to teach me how to use the sander or fix whatever was broken. And if he had Canadian Tire money, so much the better.

Back to reality. It is best to find a male: a husband or a brother to help you install programs in the computer and to guide you. I hear teens are whizzes on the computer. I don't have teens nearby. Fathers are usually not a good idea no matter how smart or kind they are. Mothers are almost impossible. I wouldn't even try.

What sort of gentleman should you get as a suitor.

Canadian men are very nice.

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