You saw that chance you took it, why must I keep believing that those steps you took would always backtrack.
Why do you twiddle with my emotions like I'm a puppet? When you walked away why? What the hell processed you to do something so small to a small child.
But now I am almost 17 and you have nothing to share with my life other than you helping become a part of this world.
Well damn it why aren't/weren't you part of my life?!
I lay in my bed praying for all my family and friends, Including you for you to realize the pain you have caused!
Don't you see me in pain when I go in my room!
Wait you don't because you don't live with me!
Now it makes sense, Then why does hope rekindle and rekindle because I have faith, I have so much power so much inside me yet when I think of you i feel the weakest!
Why are you not here with me right now for that hug, For that talk, why! Why must I keep denying the truth that you are not part of my life?
Because I need you! But you just walked away, you thought it was nothing. You say that's not true but damn it,
Look me now, I am crying uncontrollably. What do you have to show for it?! I feel like an outsider, I feel enclosed in my room, you should know when I'm down, you should be the one to pick me up.
Yes sometimes I need my space, but hell, years of it? Why so freaking long?
I don't being this way, crying, feeling weak. When I can't even remember the last good time we've shared!
Your face, I see every damn day because I look like you.
Do you know how much that pains, that aches, do you have any freaking clue?
Can't you tell any more that you walked away when I needed you the most, when I needed you to pick me up and put me on your shoulders to make all the shit go away.
All I ever wanted you to know was that I needed you but I can't even bring myself to call you and tell you that!
Why must you put me through hell? Do you get pleasure out of this pain? You say you don't but what the hell? I'm not dieing no , not the outside but good lord on the inside.
I've had people in my life that I've felt closer, than you. I hate being pissed off, I hate being sad, but there is no other way because all I ever hear is that you're sick.
You think I don't care?! What about all the years?! Do you care!? When you think about me, do you know my emotions, do you know my fears, do you even know my favorite color? No! I've never felt this way before. I hate it, as I am soon to hate you. I'm crying now,
I have been for the past years. Don't you see it! No once again you don't because you're not here! I thought I would have you to make it okay, to seem like I can be invincible. But I've had to grow up, feels like on my own. Yes `they` have helped me, but I've had to come up and develop myself by myself because you're not here! What happened.. fill me in...
